Breakdown

I feel as if I am on the verge of a mental breakdown. Between losing Stephanie and letting that loss actually set in, to unloading Christmas things that I avoided last year, to Stevens trial fast approaching, I am about to lose it. I am overwhelmed and emotionally exhausted. I feel like I just need to lose it and get it all out, but I feel like the amount of emotion that will spill out will be too much for me to come back from. I know Ive been told and Ive even said that your body will let out as much as it can handle, but I truly feel this is too much for one body to grieve.

I cannot believe Stephanie is gone. I cannot believe Steven is gone. I cannot believe it has almost been 3 years since Kaden has been gone. Why do people so close have to go? I don't understand. I want a miracle. I cant handle tragedy anymore.

Truly emotionally exhausted.