Lurking Grief

One of the worst parts about this "grief process" is the lurking grief. It lurks in the daily tasks we attempt while at the same time pushing all emotion out of the task. Today I had to take my car into Gosch Ford to get some minor things repaired. Steven worked there for about 2 years. During those two years, I was pregnant and we had Bryce. It was a very significant time in our lives. I would bring Steven lunch and we knew most everyone that worked there due to Stevens loud mouth and full of life personality. I went there today, coasting under the radar, attempting to get in and get out. What I thought would be a quick fix, ended up taking much longer. I was there over an hour and ended up getting a rental. Once I got my rental, I needed to go back to my car and get out the carseats. When I found my car, it was pulled into a bay that happened to be Stevens old bay. Go freakin figure. I could hardly breath. As I held back tears, I threw both car seats into the rental and drove out of there like a bat outta hell. These things just sneak up. Its so irritating. One moment you think you have your emotions in check and the next moment you are fighting off anxiety, tapping fingers and tears in your eyes. Damn this grief process! Damn you!